September 20, 2025
by Carla Hay

Directed by Allan Ungar
Culture Representation: Taking place in London and in the Los Angeles area, the action/comedy film “London Calling” features a predominantly white cast of characters (with a few black people) representing the working-class, middle-class and wealthy.
Culture Clash: A jaded assassin agrees to be an assassin mentor to the dorky 18-year-old son of the assassin’s crime boss, who wants the son to be groomed to take over his criminal activities.
Culture Audience: “London Calling” will appeal mainly to people who are fans of the movie’s headliners and unimaginative and silly movies about assassins and other criminals.

The vapid action comedy “London Calling” has the mentality of a kid who doesn’t know that the 1994 movie “Léon: The Professional” exists. The stale jokes don’t help London Calling’s predictable story about an assassin mentoring a criminal’s adolescent child. Some of the cast members are clearly having fun in their “London Calling” roles, but this violent movie’s comedy is too cornball and repetitive to be fun to watch.
Directed by Allan Ungar, “London Calling” was co-written by Ungar, Omer Levin Menekse and Quinn Wolfe. The movie takes place in London and in the Los Angeles area. “London Calling” was actually filmed in South Africa. The movie has no connection to the Clash’s 1979 “London Calling” album and title track, except for sharing the same title, and the Clash’s “London Calling” song can be heard in its entirety during the movie’s end credits.
“London Calling” begins by showing an American assassin in London. His name is Thomas “Tommy” Ward (played by Josh Duhamel), and he’s arrived at an upscale nightclub where the attendees are wearing masks. (It could easily be mistaken for an “Eyes Wide Shut” fan convention.) Thomas is on a hit job where he’s supposed to shoot and kill a man wearing a horse mask.
Instead, Tommy follows a man (played by Tristan de Beer) who’s wearing a donkey mask. It’s mentioned multiple times later in the movie that middle-aged Tommy has become near-sighted as he’s gotten older. Tommy corners the man outside the nightclub and is ready to shoot.
The man takes off his mask and says that this is a case of mistaken identity. The man says he shouldn’t be killed and warns Tommy that Tommy would be making a huge mistake if he commits this murder. The man identifies himself as the cousin of Freddy Darby’s wife. Freddy Darby (played by Aiden Gillen) is a crime lord who is Tommy’s boss.
Tommy is arrogant because he’s never before made a mistake in an assassination. He tells the man that the mask is a horse mask, not a donkey’s mask. And then, Tommy shoots and kills the man. After the murder, Tommy gets a closer look at the mask and finds out it really is a donkey mask, and the person wearing the horse mask got away.
Tommy leaves the scene and commiserates with his colleague Harry (played by Arnold Vosloo) about this big mistake. Harry mildly scolds Tommy about Tommy not taking Harry’s advice to get an eye exam. Tommy and Harry know it’s only a matter of time before Freddy finds out that Tommy killed a member of Freddy’s family, and Tommy will be put on Freddy’s hit list. Harry gets Tommy a one-way plane ticket out of London to Los Angeles.
Before Tommy leaves London, he goes to the apartment where his ex-wife Judi (played by Erica Wessels) lives with their son Oliver (played by Finnley Barnett), who’s about 9 or 10 years old. Judi has a live-in boyfriend named Ricky (played by Karl Thaning), who is a gym teacher at Oliver’s school. Tommy’s visit is so he can say a quick goodbye to Oliver, who isn’t allowed to spend time with Tommy because, as he tells Tommy, Judi frequently tells Oliver that Tommy is a “loser” who does dangerous things.
One year later, Tommy is living in Los Angeles, where he is working as an assassin for a crime boss named Benson (played by Rick Hoffman), a fast-talking sleaze who is rude and impatient. Benson is a widower (his wife died in a car accident) who has an 18-year-old son named Julian (played by Jeremy Ray Taylor), a geeky loner. Julian would rather play video games and go to live-action role playing (LARP) events (where people wear costumes as fantasy characters) than learn from his father on how to be a violent criminal. Benson is disappointed in Julian for not being equipped to take over the “family business.”
Benson has a subservient live-in girlfriend named Darya (played by Jazzara Jaslyn), whom he met at a Russian brothel, according to what Benson tells Tommy. A recurring “joke” in the movie is that Benson is always giving criticism to Darya for doing something that Benson thinks is incorrect. In other words, Benson is depicted as an irredeemable jerk who is cruel to just about everyone.
“London Calling” wastes nearly half of the movie before it gets to the central conflict of the story. Before that central conflict plays out in the film, “London Calling” shows that Julian is the target of a snobbish teenage bully named Barnabus (played by Daniel Lasker), a LARP enthusiast who wants to be the “alpha male” at all the LARP events that he attends. It just so happens that Julian has a crush on Barnabus’ sister Erika (played by (played by Daniah De Villiers), who attends the same LARP events.
The movie’s central conflict is revealed when Tommy finds out that Judi is going to marry Ricky. Tommy doesn’t respect Ricky because he thinks Ricky is a wimpy nerd. Tommy hasn’t seen Oliver for more than a year and wants to go back to London to make up for lost time and become an attentive father to Oliver. However, Tommy is apprehensive that Freddy has put a target on Tommy’s back for the killing of Freddy’s cousin-in-law.
Tommy and Benson make a deal: Benson will give Tommy extra protection that will be provided by Benson’s criminal connections in London. In exchange, Tommy has to train Julian on how to be an assassin so that Tommy and Julian can kill two of Benson’s enemies: Alistair McRory (played by Neil Sandilands) and Seamus McRory (played by Brandon Auret), who are gangster brothers. As already revealed in the “London Calling” trailer, Freddy finds out that Tommy is living in the Los Angeles area, so Freddy arrives in the area to get revenge on Tommy.
The rest of “London Calling” goes exactly how you think it will, with shootouts, fist fights, explosions and car chases—and plenty of bumbling along the way. Duhamel and Taylor have fairly good chemistry in their scenes together, but their dialogue is so mindless, the characters of Tommy and Julian just aren’t interesting enough to be entertaining for the entire movie. Meanwhile, all the other characters are one-dimensional. “London Calling” has some cheap laughs, but there’s nothing special about this derivative movie that is the very definition of a “hack job.”
Quiver Distribution released “London Calling” in select U.S. cinemas on September 19, 2025.

















