Aflamu Johnson, Annette Bening, Chris Pine, Clancy Brown, comedy, DeWanda Wise, drama, Jennifer Jason Leigh, John Ortiz, Los Angeles, movies, Poolman, Ray Wise, reviews, Stephen Tobolowsky, TIFF, Toronto International Film Festival
May 23, 2024
by Carla Hay
Directed by Chris Pine
Culture Representation: Taking place in Los Angeles, the comedy film “Poolman” features a predominantly white cast of characters (with a few African Americans and Latin people) representing the working-class, middle-class and wealthy.
Culture Clash: An apartment complex’s swimming pool cleaner, who is working on an environmental documentary about Los Angeles, investigates a corruption scheme involving a city council president and a property developer.
Culture Audience: “Poolman” will appeal primarily to people are fans of the movie’s headliners and don’t mind watching a time-wasting and poorly made movie.
“Poolman” is like a flimsy and faulty floating device that’s full of holes and quickly sinks due to its sheer incompetence. This comedy noir mystery is very unamusing and incoherent. Everyone involved should be embarrassed.
“Poolman” is the feature-film directorial debut of actor Chris Pine, who stars in the movie and co-wrote (with Ian Gotler) the abysmal screenplay. “Poolman” (which takes place in Los Angeles, where the movie was filmed on location) is clearly inspired by the Oscar-winning 1974 noir mystery “Chinatown,” starring Jack Nicholson and Faye Dunaway. However, “Poolman” removes all of the good filmmaking qualities that make “Chinatown” a classic. “Poolman” had its world premiere at the 2023 Toronto International Film Festival, which clearly chose this movie because of Pine’s fame, not because of the low quality of the film.
In “Poolman,” Darren Barrenman (played by Pine) is a long-haired, scruffy, wannabe documentarian who has a day job as the swimming pool cleaner for a shabby motel-like apartment complex called the Tahitian Tiki. Darren (who is the only employee of his Awesome Aquatics business) lives in a small trailer that is awkwardly located on the side of the Tahitian Tiki’s swimming pool. Darren is dating Tahitian Tiki manager Susan Kerkovich (played by Jennifer Jason Leigh), but their relationship seems to be stuck in a rut. Darren and Susan have boring conversations that go nowhere, such as when they are in bed and talk about how the owner of their favorite chicken restaurant has recently died.
Darren has an obsession with real-life environmental activist Erin Brockovich, so he is seen typing (on a typewriter) a letter to her every day. These letters, which are read out loud in voiceovers, are quite pathetic because Darren sounds like a jilted ex-lover in these letters, even though he has apparently never met Brockovich. Darren wants to make an important environmental documentary about Los Angeles and is against any property development that might harm the environment. One of the reasons why he’s directing this documentary is so he can impress Brockovich.
Darren has three friends who are helping him with this documentary: Diane Esplinade (played by Annette Bening), who seems to be a producer, constantly rambles about New Age self-care gibberish. Jack Denisoff (played by Danny DeVito) is a cinematographer, who often likes to talk about his glory days working as a television director. Wayne (played by John Ortiz), who is a production assistant, is described as Darren’s “best friend” and a “union analyst.”
“Poolman” is so poorly written, it isn’t made immediately clear what type of relationship Diane and Jack have with emotionally immature Darren. When Diane and Jack are first seen with Darren in the movie, Diane and Jack act like they are Darren’s parents, not his documentary co-worker/friends. Darren’s relationship with “best friend” Wayne is also strange, with no backstory.
Darren makes himself a nuisance at Los Angeles City Council meetings to protest anything that he thinks will harm the environment. Darren is very suspicious of an upcoming property development called the Very Venice Housing Project. At one of these meetings, Darren is ranting about an environmental study that he has completed. The president of the Los Angeles City Council is Stephen Toronkowski (played by Stephen Tobolowsky), who sees that Darren is attempting a filibuster, so he orders Darren to stop.
A bailiff named Reggie (played by Aflamu Johnson) tries to stop Darren, but Darren assaults Reggie. Darren is arrested, but he is bailed out of jail by June Del Rey (played by DeWanda Wise), who dresses and acts like she thinks she’s in a 1940s noir film. June tells Darren that she’s Stephen’s new executive assistant and says she needs Darren’s help in exposing Stephen as a corrupt politician. Darren has a romantic attraction to June that never looks believable in this dreadful movie.
Meanwhile, Darren’s investigation involves a wealthy property developer named Theodore “Teddy” Hollandaise (played by Clancy Brown), the CEO of Big Dutch Group, the company behind the Very Venice Housing Project. There’s also another rich mogul named William Van Patterson (played by Ray Wise), who becomes part of the story. Darren and his documentary film pals get involved in amateurish and bumbling spying on suspicious characters.
Everything in “Poolman” is sloppily conceived and clumsily executed. Bening does the best that she can in a terribly written role, while the other cast members’ performances are mediocre-to-horrible. Pine constantly mugs for the camera and smirks in ways that quickly become irritating, as Darren shows how much of a moronic “investigator” he can be.
The secrets and surprise “reveals” for some of the characters just add to the movie’s idiocy. There are plenty of low-budget, independent movies that are of low quality, but “Poolman” didn’t have to be this bad, considering the well-known talent involved. All of that talent is wasted and goes down the drain quicker than obnoxious poolman Darren can empty a pool.
Vertical released “Poolman” in select U.S. cinemas on May 10, 2024.